When we found out that we were pregnant with baby #2, I was so excited for Harrison. My gut feeling was that Harrison was going to be pumped to be a big bro. That he would love little baby Jonathan immensely. But I also had that anxious thought in the back of my mind of what if he turns into an insane child and can’t handle splitting the attention of mom and dad with baby brother?!

I kept speaking to my anxious heart that he would still feel loved. He would still feel important. And that having a little brother was going to be the greatest blessing to him. When I struggle with anxiety and worry, I oftentimes have to repeat to myself truth. Over, and over, and over again.

In our preparation for little Jonathan, we did try to make a conscious effort to do a few important things to prepare him. Those are what I’m going to share with you today…

Talked about baby brother a lot!

We talked about baby brother growing in mommy’s tummy all the time. We talked about him at dinner. We talked about him in the car. We talked about him while playin with Harrison in his playroom. We talked and talked and talked about what life would look like with baby brother in the world.

We also made a concious effort to make those conversations positive. What I mean is that we focused on the things Harrison would have to teach baby brother. The games that they would play together. How great Harrison would be at sharing his toys with baby brother. And so forth…rather than talking about how Harrison was no longer going to be the center of attention all of the time.

Read & watched examples of others being a big brother

Every night for about a month, one of the books I would read Harrison in the evening before he went to bed was a book about becoming a big brother. What’s worked well for Harrison in the past with big transitions is reading and taking in the transition through a book. I did the same thing with him when he was getting ready to potty train, again when he transitioned to a big kid bed.

We’d also point out when we’d watch movies or TV shows where one of the characters was a big brother. There’s a Daniel Tiger episode for just about anything it seems, and becoming a big brother is no exception. We watched that episode over and over and over again.

We let him help with preparing for baby

When it came to getting our house and the nursery ready for baby brother, we let Harrison help with putting together the baby equipment, playing with and putting away baby brother’s toys, and helping wash his clothes. Harrison is naturally a helper. He likes to help both Nathan and I with all sorts of things, so it was only natural to let him help with getting the house ready for baby brother.

Making time for Harrison after baby brother arrived

I was concerned before Jonathan arrived that I wouldn’t have enough time to focus on and play with Harrison. If anything, I think I should have been more concerned for the opposite. Poor Jonathan often times got put down in his bouncy seat or swing so that I could focus on Harrison. But, we did get a helpful tip from a friend before Jonathan was born to make sure we verbalize that Harrison’s needs were as important as Jonathan. That meant saying on occasion to Jonathan, “One minute, Jonathan, I need to help Harrison clean up from his lunch.” More often than not, we were telling Harrison that he needed to wait for Jonathan to be done needing Mom or Dad’s help, so it was equally important for Harrison to hear that Jonathan had to wait for his parents sometimes too.

None of these things in and of themselves are profound ideas or actions. They are small steps to help a toddler mind wrap around a big transition in their lives.

And while we have our moments of pure chaos and jealousy, Harrison is an amazing older brother, just as we anticipated.