{{A note to the reader: I’ve written my little boys letters throughout their whole lives. I share some of them here on this blog. Some are kept just for them in their memory boxes. Letters are my way of memorializing their childhood and their mama’s love for them. Our little Jonathan, who is our youngest, turned two this past weekend. I’m sharing my letter to him here.}}

My sweet little Jonathan Brooks. Happy second birthday, little boy! Another milestone, another letter from your mama. You are really starting to blossom lately, little guy. You make us laugh and smile every day. The day starts with you waking up and asking us to “mow?” And ends with you always telling us there’s a “BUG! BUG!!” in your room. Our nights are punctuated by me asking you just before I lay you down to sleep, “How much does mama love you?” To always have you respond with a “so much” that sounds like “fruit snacks.” I will always love you fruit snacks, little boy.

You are loving being treated like a big kid these days. Using real cups, testing out the scooters and bikes outside, and eager to help Harrison drive his blue truck around the block, although that help is not so eagerly received by the driver.

Seemingly out of nowhere, you began to talk non-stop. All of the words seemed to come at once, and every day you amaze me by what you know and pick up on from us and learn at school.

You love your brother. I can already see it in your admiration and way that you mimic him. And he adores you.

Two years ago you joined us earth side, and those times in the middle of the pandemic were not the start that I had hoped for you. We survived as a little family unit with little to no interaction with anyone outside of our family. I remember it being so very hard. And also so very sweet. While as a first time mom I struggled with post-partum depression after Harrison and an anxiousness about my abilities as a mother, with you, I was more assured. I knew the depth of my love for you right away. I knew that you were healing to me in a time where our world felt so disjointed and broken.

You have always been my mama’s boy. And maybe that won’t continue forever, but I like to think there’s a special connection between the two of us. For the fact that for so long, you only had our little family to care for you, and specifically your mommy. It seemed to bind us together in a very special way.

It’s an honor to be your safe place. Your home. I hope you grow up knowing you can always come “home.” I will always be here for my sweet, sensitive boy.

I hope you have the best birthday, buddy. I’m so excited to watch you grow.

All my love, always and forever,

Mommy