Are you as interested in Day in the Life posts as I am? There’s something about getting a peak into someone’s everyday life that satisfies the same piece of me that adores reality TV. (Yes….I know reality TV isn’t actually real. But I love it all the same.) So how about I take you along for a typical spring Saturday with the Lanes?
We were in the hospital after Jonathan, our second son, was born. Our nurse was getting ready to discharge us to go home and introduce big brother Harrison to this littlest Lane. She was walking me through things to look for after I went home that would require medical attention.
“If you experience sadness lasting longer than two weeks, you’ll want to see your doctor.”
I felt a lump in my throat. “And what would that mean?” I asked.
“That’s a symptom of postpartum depression.”
I felt Nathan’s hand on my back in support, and my eyes welling up slightly. The realization two years after Harrison was born that confirmed my suspicions. That after Harrison was born, I suffered from postpartum depression.
Whooo! It’s my birthday TOMORROW. Year 35 both did and didn’t go as planned. At this time last year, little Jonathan was very well baking and set to arrive in July. But as I’ve said many times on here, his birth and my maternity leave was so far from anything I could have imagined a year ago.
This year has taught us a lot of really hard lessons. I thought I’d share a few of the things I’ve learned about myself over the past year.
Some of you have been hopping over to my little corner of the internet for over a year now. Others just wandered in and may be wondering, “Who exactly is this person?”
So let me introduce myself. I’m Lauren. I’m a 35 year old, organization and list lover, mama to two little boys, who spends my summers wandering through my backyard garden and then posting pretty flower pictures. I’m so glad you’re here!
Here are some of the questions I get asked most in blog world and over on Instagram.
When we found out that we were pregnant with baby #2, I was so excited for Harrison. My gut feeling was that Harrison was going to be pumped to be a big bro. That he would love little baby Jonathan immensely. But I also had that anxious thought in the back of my mind of what if he turns into an insane child and can’t handle splitting the attention of mom and dad with baby brother?!
I kept speaking to my anxious heart that he would still feel loved. He would still feel important. And that having a little brother was going to be the greatest blessing to him. When I struggle with anxiety and worry, I oftentimes have to repeat to myself truth. Over, and over, and over again.
Jonathan’s birthday started on the most treasured day of the week for his brother, Harrison. Thursday. Trash day. We woke Thursday, July 30th believing that we would be waiting yet another day to meet our new sweet little one. Both Nathan and I thought that when Jonathan would make his appearance, labor would start in the early hours of the morning, just like Harrison’s labor. So awaking Thursday morning, I was disappointed that it would be one more day VERY pregnant on a VERY hot, humid summer day.
The boys gathered the trash and wheeled the trash cans to the curb, a favorite weekday activity for Harrison! And then I grabbed my one cup of coffee and set up camp with Harrison in the driveway to wait to wait for the trash trucks to come “dump the rocks out.” (Harrison’s interpretation of the trash truck’s job.) One truck came by, and about 8:30 in the morning, as we were waiting for the recycling truck, contractions started.
Hi friends! It’s been a couple of weeks since my last post, and in case you were wondering where I had gone, our newest addition to the Lane family arrived on just in time to be a July baby on Thursday, July 30th.
Jonathan Brooks has been a complete joy for our family. Harrison is loving being a big brother, and we are settling in to our new normal as a family of four. I’m going to take a few more weeks off from blogging, as we adjust to Nathan heading back to work and me juggling the two boys during the day. I do get around to posting daily pictures and videos of the boys over on Instagram, so pop over there to keep up with us until I can work in time to write, and say ‘hi!’
If you’re new around here, every once in awhile I like to round up seven quick things that are making me laugh or melting my heart about Harrison currently. It’s an easy way that I can memorialize these small little bits of his personality as he grows, hoping that I can remember the things that made each stage special.
-1- I mentioned to Nathan the other day that I’m going to miss when Harrison starts referring to himself in the first person. And he pointed out that in fact Harrison does refer to himself in the first person when he says, “I need a hug!” Ok, ok. This one time I’ll allow the use of the word “I.”
My final trimester of pregnancy is coming to a close. <Insert happy dance!> In all seriousness, I have made a very conscious effort to enjoy this pregnancy more. To embrace my body that is growing another human being, rather than get frustrated at the number of pounds gained or how I looked. I am unbelievably grateful for this body that is able to sustain life, and I know that is a privilege that so many would ache to have. But, I am ready to move to the next phase of meeting this new little man.
This popped up on my Instagram feed the other day, and it really hit home. This time three years ago waiting for Harrison, the fear and anxiety I had over the birth, how we would survive with a newborn, how Nathan and I would transition to parenthood were all-consumiing. And this time around, even though I know it won’t be the same, there’s confidence that we will be alright. And we will figure it out. And yes, it will be hard. And yes, there are going to be things that we didn’t experience with Harrison that we’ll experience this time, but it will all even out. And we’ll be ok. Better than ok. It will be hard to imagine our family without the newest little guy.
Recently, we sat on our back patio with some friends who had just announced that they were pregnant with their first. What an exciting time of life to have our friends starting to have babies! But they asked us a question, as I kept one eye and ear on Harrison running around the patio kicking and throwing a ball. If we were going to do it all again, which we are, what’s the one thing that we would absolutely not do this time around.
I didn’t have a good answer. Parenting is such a personal thing, in my opinion. Every child is different. Every family is different. The only thing I could really think of that I would do differently is allow myself some more grace to live in the messy state of life that is figuring out life as a family of three.